i'd rather school that work any time. its rather apt to think about what motivates you at work when you are really into the job. i can't really hate my job cause it perfectly merges the use of both my degrees and its quite fun to think of it. (minus the Christian Evangelising, shitty pay and the dress code) i can confess that I AM rather happy at my job.

i learn more than i need

i am forced to pick up new skills

i work in some ulu place that has no shopping/ food hunts

i am taking over a department

so things are lookingup. but back to the original question. MOTIVATION. it can't be money because my pay is shitty. it can't be teaching because i'm actually scared to make mistakes in front of ruly kids and it can't be my workplace because of the fact that I am the ONLY non Christian in the midst of a bunch of God LOVING people.

so what is it then? seriously i have no idea. i'm still searching for myself and carving a niche, but i'm learning alot along the way. i amaze myself sometimes and my Boss is impressed with my Marketing work, so i cannot be complacent and think that everything will be fine. My boss seems good at streching people when they get into comfort zone.

oh yes i will upload pictures when i'm well. being sick and bleeding at the same time is the worse combination ever. met up with beloveds lately: Grace, Janelle, Ryan, Marcus and Ameily.

proposalsfolderdesignsemailsphonecallsresearchmedicines

thats on my list for today.

tada.

janice.

i find spending time with him so enjoyable nowadays, even if we do the most chill things like sipping tea and eating cookies at my place at night while its raining watching korean dramas.

i've never felt like this before. i guess this is what you call Bliss.

its always the small little things that make a huge difference.

you always know what i dislike eating and you'll eat it before i say i don't want it.

you always give me a hug even before i need one.

you always give me a listening ear no matter where you are.

you always are there for me.

maybe its because of the LDR, we treasure each other more, learnt to be more tolerant and more trustful, less doubts and less bickers.

janice. in short- we have learnt to love. and i love you.

My life in piktaures:

Brought the boy to do his brows with me. hahaa.

Remus' xmas play at his church.

Angela's free concert Eons ago with Gracey.

Azzah's childcare center performance.

our 2.5 year anniversary.

_____________________________________________

i am freaking BROKE for this month and next month.

xmas is here thats for one. and then driving is two. its gross as hell to spend almost 1.1k in 2 months just for driving lessons and administration fees. but i refuse to take money from my mum. even though they wanna sponsor me to drive. i'm going to do this on my own. to begin with i already feel bad not giving allowances this month and the next. but i have phone bills to pay, transport to give and i guess no shopping for the month of jan then.

sad. i need to start saving again. was thinking of changing my wallet to a coach, but i guess that has to wait till my birthday next year.

janice. company xmas luncheon today! and i'm almost done with work but i'm a bit behind schedule which sucks big time.

i realised i can get quite defensive sometimes. i don't give others a chance to say something.

time for change. i have so much changes in life that sometimes i wonder its it me growing as a person or am i throughly losing myself?

janice. xmas and holidays are finally coming.

this weekend has been crazy.

friday: went to watch New Moon, which sucked like hell, though i liked the books (it was an easy read) and the first movie. New Moon sucked to the core. there was no climax at all, everything was so choppy, like they were fitting in everything for the sake of it not for the story, things moved from one thing to another too fast. maybe because i read the books, but it was so boring. it was an utter disappointment.

saturday: went to help azzah with her childcare graduation performance. i'll upload pictures about that soon in a sep post. that was till 11pm, by the time Ameily, Marcus and i got home it was almost 1am, and that was after taking care of crying kids, but i swear they were adorable.

sunday: shopping with hock and we watched couple's retreat. HAHA, i have a soft spot for shopping. damn i bought 2 pairs of shoes in like 2 days and a new bag. damn. i'm a sucker for shoes and bags. my current new shoe brand is Mitju, super comfy shoes that look awesome since i'm off heels for a while. Couple's retreat is a worth watch.

monday. its work day.

janice. :) pictures soon!

i know what its like to fall in love again.

how i've missed this feeling. for 2 and a half months i'll keep you safe in my hands. for the next 5 months after that i'll keep you buried in my heart, before my heart breaks.

welcome home my love. you've put colour on my drained life. you've put smiles on my gloomy life. you've put laughter in my lack- lustre life. You've put food back on my menu of life.

You've made me feel worth living for.

janice.

sometimes my boss is super irritating, but he really taught me something(s) today.

1. we shouldn't learn to live up to other's people's expectations, rather live up to your own expectations cause its tiring to please people every single day.

2. critical thinking and value add is very important

janice. i'm too tired.

i wish i brought my ear phones so i can work with some music on. i cannot imagine life without music.

oh wait. no. my boss says all pop music is evil.

janice. i should be a nun.

its back to being me again. hello work. its monday.

i appreciate how weekends are spent doing nothing. i feel i'm getting old. the body seems to be able to let u know that you aren't able to stay up for hours non stop. but on the other hand if you enjoy what you do then maybe you'll never feel tired. its like a double edged sword.

i don't even know how long i can stay in this company when work suddenly seems stifiling. it seems scary yet challenging. that feeling of uncertainty.

i want to learn so many things yet i'm so limited by resources. though i know i should count myself lucky that i even manged to get a double degree overseas. i need to learn driving and i want to learn Korean, but its quite sad that its not as popular as Japanese or French. and i also need to learn some basic sign language too.

janice. sometimes dreams are called dreams because they can only be true in dreams.

fell in love with this Korean Drama called You're Beautiful. terribly upset that its over after 16 episodes. its the goofiest romantic comedy drama i've watched with the perfect cast. it made me finish 19 hours of drama in 2 days.

its the typical korean super hot boy band needs new member, the guy chosen has a failed plastic surgery and his twin sister (a nun in training) steps in a pretends to be him till he returns. Arrogant leader finds out she is a girl/ hates her cause she keeps messing things up but helps her keep the secret for the band's sake. and the typical part come HERE: she falls in love with him, he likes her/ finds out that she likes him, but due to many circumstances he can't like her. Second male lead aka the sacrificial lamb also likes her and 'saves' her way too many times. so does the goofy third male lead.

But in the end, its a happy ending.

the main reason why i love korean shows is also because of the behind the scenes footage, though i've been watching CSI for 9 seasons, there is less than 10 videos of behind the scenes footage. but every episode of korean drama there is like 10mins per episode. and its funny like hell, but u also get to understand how difficult a production can be. like falling down more than 10 times for a 10 sec shot. or braving the cold winds and rain.

i'll miss the pig-rabbit, the lame korean pop song/ commercial parodies, i'll miss the handsome cast and the soundtrack.

janice. no more eye candy and brain food. i call it an addiction but hock says i'm possessed. but it seems i'm not alone. though the ratings were around 10-12% in Korea, its been doing super well online. its viewing is no 1 on ppstream and other sites, its a landslide margin. read HERE.

PS: i just said goodbye to my last weekend alone till feb. 5 months